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Son: "Mom can I get twenty bucks"
Mom: Does it look like I am made of money
Son: "Well isn't that what M.O.M stands for?"

Q: What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?
A: "Where's Popcorn?"

Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side.

What does a nosey pepper do?
Gets jalapeno business!

What did the bra say to the hat?
You go on a head while I give these two a lift!

Did you hear about the Italian chef that died?
He pasta way.
We cannoli do so much.
His legacy will become a pizza history.

Why did the hipster burn his tongue?
Because he ate his food before it was cool.

What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job!

Police Officer: "How high are you?"
Stoner: "No officer, it's "Hi, How are you?"

I love Pandas, they're so chill. They're like "Dude, racism is stupid. I'm White, Black, and Asian....."

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