Makeup Jokes

What kind of car does a makeup artist drive?
A compact car.

Why do girls put on makeup and perfume?
Because they're ugly and they stink.

Why did the blonde put on makeup before going to bed?
She wanted to get an hour of beauty sleep.

Why did the blonde put lipstick on her head?
She was trying to makeup her mind.

What kind of father buys his daughter makeup?
A MAC daddy.

Why did the girl bring lipstick and eye shadow to school?
She had a make-up exam!

What do you call a cat that wears make up?

What kind of makeup do ghosts wear?

Hey I just met you, and girl you look crazy.
What brands your makeup? Crayola maybe.

Why does a blonde wear green lipstick?
Because red means Stop.

What is Taylor Swift's favorite kind of makeup?

Did you hear about the wife of Dr. Dre?
She's Straight Outta Cold Cream.

What did the Daisy Duck say when she bought lipstick?
Put it on my bill.

Did you see the movie about the fabulous secret agents?
It's called "Men In Black Eyeliner".

How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
She found another woman's lipstick on his knuckles.

Makeup helps young women improve on mother nature and older women trick father time.

What's the difference between Cersei Lannister and a direwolf?

Women fall in love with what they hear, men fall in love with what they can see, that's why women wear make up and men lie.

Find a guy that ruins your lipstick not your mascara.

How come the Avon lady can't talk? Cuz her lipstick...

I heard all the girls want to be like Posh Spice and "Blend It Like Beckham".

Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?

The best thing for a woman's face, believe it or not, is semen.

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