Thor Jokes

What is the Avengers favorite day of the week?

What do you get when you cross Thor and King Kong?
Two angry fictional characters

What is Thor's favorite drink?
Fruit punch!

What did Thor say to Spider Man?
"Don't bug me."

What TV show do the daughters of Asgard watch?

How does a superhero browse the internet?
On a compu-Thor.

What do you call a superhero with a beard and glasses?
A Hips-thor.

What's the difference between the Thor and a unicorn?
Nothing, they're both fictional characters

Did you hear that Jane Foster is pregnant?
Yeah, she's in her first Trimes-Thor.

What does every couch in the new Avengers facility have?
Thor pillows.

What do you call a superhero that writes novels?
An au-Thor.

What do you call a shell-fish god?

I think Loki is a deceptive tricks-thor.

T.H.O.R. = The Hammer's Over Rated

Superman was feeling bored after a long break of crime fighting & wanted to go out & party so he called Thor to ask if he wanted to go to a club & pick up some girls.

Thor said Jane Foster was ill & he had to look after her.

A little disappointed, Superman called Iron Man to see if wanted to grab a couple of beers. Iron Man told him he had a date with Black Widow.

As a last resort, Superman flew over to Wonder woman's apartment to see If she was free.

As he landed on her balcony, he saw Wonder Woman naked on the bed with her legs open.

Superman thought to himself "I'm faster than a speeding bullet, I could be in there, have sex & out again before she knew what was happening."

So Superman did his super thing in a split second & flies off happily.

Meanwhile on the bed, Wonder woman said "Did you hear anything?"

"NO"! said the Invisible Man, "But my ass hurts like hell!"

Four Corners
There is a big room with four corners.
In the first corner, you find Captain America.
In the second corner you find Thor.
In the third corner you find Incredible Hulk.
And in the fourth corner you find an extremely intelligent, 100% natural blonde woman with an amazing ultra-thin magazine-model figure.
In the center of the room there is a pot of gold.
Who gets to the pot of gold first?

None, because none of these characters exist.

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