Hawkeye Jokes

Q: What's the difference between Hawkeye and a unicorn?
A: Nothing, they're both fictional characters

Q: What did Black Widow say to Hawkeye?
A: "You make me quiver."

Q: What did Hawkeye say to Spider Man?
A: "Don't bug me."

Q: Why did Hawkeye flush the toilet?
A: Because it was his duty!

Q: What did Hawkeye say when he hit a bull?
A: I got a bullseye.

Q: What does Hawkeye wear with his suit?
A: A bow tie.

Q: What does Hawkeye put in his beverages?
A: Just ice.

Superman was feeling bored after a long break of crime fighting & wanted to go out & party so he called Batman to ask if he wanted to go to a club & pick up some girls.

Batman said Robin was ill & he had to look after him.

A little disappointed, Superman called Hawkeye to see if wanted to grab a couple of beers. Hawkeye told him he had a date with Black Widow.

As a last resort, Superman flew over to Wonder woman's apartment to see If she was free.

As he landed on her balcony, he saw Wonder Woman naked on the bed with her legs open.

Superman thought to himself "I'm faster than a speeding bullet, I could be in there, have sex & out again before she knew what was happening."

So Superman did his super thing in a split second & flies off happily.

Meanwhile on the bed, Wonder woman said "Did you hear anything?"

"NO"! said the Invisible Man, "But my ass hurts like hell!"

Four Corners
There is a big room with four corners.
In the first corner, you find Superman.
In the second corner you find Batman.
In the third corner you find Hawkeye.
And in the fourth corner you find an extremely intelligent, 100% natural blonde woman with an amazing ultra-thin magazine-model figure.
In the center of the room there is a pot of gold.
Q:Who gets to the pot of gold first?

A: None, because none of these characters exist.

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