State Jokes
Alabama
Q: Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Alabama State Lottery?
A: The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.
Q: Why did O. J. Simpson want to move to Alabama?
A: Everyone has the same DNA.
Q: What new law was recently passed in Alabama?
A: When a couple gets divorced, they're still brother and sister!
Q: What's the best thing to ever come out of Alabama?
A: I-20 and I-10
Q. Why did they build the Mercedes plant so close to the University of
Alabama?
A. Because they have an endless supply of crash test dummies right down the
road.
Q. Why is Auburn always in the dark?
A. Because they're afraid of Alabama Power.
Q. What's the best road sign in Auburn?
A. Tuscaloosa - 120 miles
Q. What is the most common line used by an Auburn alum?
A. Would you like fries with that?
Q. Why did they build the Mercedes plant so close to the University of
Alabama?
A. Because they have an endless supply of crash test dummies right down the
road.
Q. Why is Auburn always in the dark?
A. Because they're afraid of Alabama Power.
Q. What do you call a genius at Alabama?
A. Visitor.
Q. Whats the difference between Alabama and cheerios?
A. One belongs in a bowl. The other doesn't!
Q. How do you get an Auburn student off your porch?
A. Pay him for the pizza!
Q. What's the difference between a University of Alabama sorority sister and
a scarecrow?
A. One lives in a field and is stuffed with hay. The other frightens birds
and small animals.
Alaska
Q: How do you know your Alaskan?
A: You know which leaves make good toilet paper!
Q: Why couldn't the Anchorage school district buy enough buses for children?
A: Because they had to buy the Zambonis first!
Q: How do Alaskans get a great upper body workout?
A: By shoveling their driveways!
Arkansas
Q: What do a divorce in Arkansas, a tornado in Kansas, and a hurricane in
Florida have in common?
A: Somebody's fixin' to lose them a trailer.
Q: Why do folks in Arkansas go to the movie theater in groups of 18 or more?
A: 'Cuz 17 and under not admitted.
Q: What do you get when you have 32 Arkansasians in the same room?
A: A full set of teeth.
Q: Why did O. J. Simpson want to move to Arkansas?
A: Everyone has the same DNA.
Q: What's the best thing to ever come out of Arkansas?
A: I-40.
Michigan
Q: How many University of Michigan fans does it take to screw in a light
bulb?
A: One, but he gets 3 credits.
Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the University of Michigan
campus?
A: A visitor.
Q: Why do they throw out a sack of manure at University of Michigan
weddings?
A: To keep the flies off the bride.
Q: Did you hear about the University of Michigan fan who locked his keys in
his car?
A: He couldn't get his family out.
Q: Why do University of Michigan fans keep their diplomas on their
dashboards?
A: So they can park in handicap spaces.
New Jersey
Q: Why Don't Gays Live in New Jersey?
A: Because they have taste!