Yo Mama Religious Jokes


Yo mama so old her first job was as Cain and Abel's babysitter.

Yo momma so chatty ever the pastor tries to avoid her.

Yo mama so fat she was baptised in the ocean.

Yo mama so dumb I asked her if she was a catholic and she said "Yeah, I've loved cats all my life"

Yo mama so ugly she couldn't find a priest to officiate her wedding.

Yo mama so religious se can name all the Left Behind books in order.

Yo mommas so fat when she died and went to heaven Jesus said there was no room so then she went to hell and the devil said HELL NO.

Yo momma so dumb she's a lesbian and voted for Rick Santorum.

Yo momma so stupid, she let the priest give you a prostate exam.

Yo momma so old, she knows which Testament is more accurate.

Yo mama so ugly Moses regretted not adding an 11th commandment "Thou shall not look at your mother"

Yo mamma so crazy she asks why can't you be more like "Kirk Cameron"

Yo mama so religious, not even the coronavirus can stop her from going to church.

Yo mama so stupid she thought THE EXORCIST was a workout video.

Yo momma so dumb, I told her something about Jessa Duggar and she said "Who's Jessa and why does she like me?"

Your mama so fat when she jumped in the ocean she said "Beat that Moses."

Yo mama is so ugly that she made devil go to church.

Yo mama so dumb she thought 19 Kids and Counting was a show about Mormons.

yo mama so white, people ask her if she's ascending to heaven.

Yo Mama so Old she was one of Solomon's concubines.

Yo mam is so ugly that, when she steps up to the pearly gates, Saint Peter will have locked them!

Yo mamma so fat when she sat on the bible Jesus came begging her to set his people free

Yo mama so fat, she visited Egypt and dropped her tampon in the water, and created the Red Sea

Yo mamma so dumb she confuses intelligent design with interior design.

yo mama is so old that she pre-ordered the bible.

Yo mama so fat even Moses can't part her legs.

Yo mama so white people ask her if she's ever been to heaven before.

Yo mama is so fat she sat down in the front row at church and the minister thought she was the only one there.

Yo mama's butt cheeks are so big, even Moses couldn't part them.

Yo momma such a smart ass she threw her watch out the window, just to see if it could intelligently evolve into a bird.

Yo mama so Buddhist, I gave her a vacuum for Christmas and she returned it because it had "too many attachments"

yo mama so ugly that santa said ho ho holy shit

Yo mamma so fat when God told Moses to separate the Red Sea, Moses told her to do a cannonball.

Yo mama so old she still has a friendship bracelet with Jesus.

Yo mama so fat when she bunge jumps she goes straight to hell!

Yo mama is so ugly she chased the devil to church.

Yo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized

Yo mama such a bad christian, the only thing holy about her is the Swiss cheese in her fridge.

Yo mama so fat that when she jumped off a bridge she baptised the whole world.

Yo mama so old she planted the apple tree in The Garden of Eden!

Yo mama so tall she did a back flip and kicked Jesus in the chin

yo mama so poor when she heard about the Last Supper she thought she was running out of food stamps

Yo mama such an old whore she slept with the Father, The Son, and the Holy Ghost

Yo Mama's so ugly that when Satan saw her, he said "This must be my punishment" and went to church for a whole year.

Yo mama so fat not even Jesus could lift her spirits

yo mama's so ugly even god said go to hell

Yo mama so ugly, when the Grinch came to steal Christmas, he left the wrapping paper and put it on her face.

Yo mama so fat when she walked past the t.v. you missed 16, 17, & 18 Kids and Counting.

Yo daddy so Jewish, he watches a porno backwards because he likes the part where the hooker gives the money back.

Yo Mama's so nasty she joined the four horseman: war, death, famine, disease and Yo mama

Yo momma so old her maiden name is Mary Magdalene.

Yo mama so old the Bible is her yearbook.

Your mama is so fat that she went to church and god said "Let my people go."

yo mama so ugly JESUS said go to HELL and get a MAKEOVER.

Yo mama so old her first job was shoveling shit on Noah's Ark.

Yo momma so fat when she died she couldn't get through the pearly gates.

Yo Mama so black, when she died and went heaven God said sorry no darkness allowed

yo momma so, ugly when she died and St Peter saw her, he said, "are you kidding me you to ugly to go to heaven"

"Yo mama such a Dumb, when she lost her virginity, she swam all over the world to look for it".

Jesus rode into Jerusalem on a wild ass. Yo Mama's ass!

your daddy is so bald, when God said let there be light it shined of your daddy's forehead into his eyes, God asked him to turn away..... we call that night.

Yo mama so old and horny, Mary Magdalene was her less scandalous sister.

Yo mama's so fat, when Santa saw her, he said, "ho ho holy shit! That's an ugly bitch!"

Yo mama so fat she fell off the bed and went straight to hell

your mama is so old she was a crossing guard for when Moses parted the red sea

Yo mama so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper.

Yo mama so old she got her bible signed by jesus

Yo mama so old she dated john the baptist

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