Delaware Jokes
Short Delaware Jokes
Q. What's the difference between a Delaware State sorority sister and a scarecrow?
A. One lives in a field and is stuffed with hay. The other frightens birds and small animals.
Q: Why do Delaware State grads keep their diplomas on their dashboards?
A: So they can park in handicap spaces.
Q: What did Delaware?
A: A New Jersey.
Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the University of Delaware campus?
A: A visitor.
Q: What did Dela ware to the Iditarod?
A: I don't know but alaska.
Q: Did you hear about the power outage at the Delaware State University library?
A: Thirty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours.
Q: Did you hear about the fire in University of Delaware's football dorm that destroyed 20 books?
A: The real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet.
Q: What does the average Delaware State University student get on his SAT?
A: Drool.
Q: How many Delaware State University freshman does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, it's a sophomore course.
Q: If you have a car containing a Fighting Blue Hen wide receiver, a Fighting Blue Hen linebacker, and a Fighting Blue Hen defensive back, who is driving the car?
A: The cop.
Q: What is the definition of safe sex down in Delaware?
A: Placing signs on the animals that kick.
Q: How do you casterate an Delaware Fighting Blue Hens fan?
A: Kick his sister in the mouth
Q: Why do Delaware students have TGIF on their shoes?
A: Toes Go In First!
Q. What do you get when you drive quickly through the Delaware State University campus?
A. An undergraduate degree.
Q: Why are rectal thermometers banned at the University of Delaware?
A: They cause too much brain damage!
Q: What should you do if you find three Delaware Fighting Blue Hen football fans buried up to their neck in cement?
A: Get more cement.
Q: What's the difference between an Delaware Fighting Blue Hen fan and a carp?
A: One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.
Q. Why do they sell so many button-fly jeans in Delaware?
A. Because the sheep can hear the zippers a mile away.
Q. How did the Delaware Fighting Blue Hen die from drinking milk?
A. The cow fell on him!
Q: How do you get a man in Delaware to do sit-ups?
A: Put the remote control between his toes..
Q: What does a Delaware grad call a Maryland grad in 5 years?
A: Boss!
I'm not saying Delaware basketball players are dumb, but the coach is dressing six players for this Saturdays game.
The rest will dress themselves.
Q: Why is "The Wave" banned in Delaware Stadium?
A: Two Fightin Blue Hens fans drowned last year.
Q: Why did the University Of Delaware regents decide to cover Delaware Stadium in cardboard?
A: Because the Huskies always look better on paper.
Q: What happens when blondes move from New York to Delaware?
A: Both states become smarter!
Q: Why aren't Delaware State cheerleaders allowed to do the splits?
A: They stick to the ground.
Q: Why do all the trees in Maryland lean east?
A: Delaware Sucks
Q: What does a girl from Delaware State do if she's not in bed by 10pm?
A: Go Home.
Q: Why do University of Delaware basketball players use body heat activated deodorant?
A: Because it's the closet they will come to getting a "Degree".
Q: Why do Delaware State students have such beautiful noses?
A: They're hand picked.
Q: Why did Delaware State disband its water polo team?
A: All the horses drowned.
Q: What's the difference between a Delaware State diploma and toilet paper?
A: About $50,000 per sheet.
Q: What does it say on the back of every Delaware State diploma?
A: Will Work For Food.
Q: Why did the Delaware Tech grad cross the road?
A: Better question why is he out of jail?
Q: How does a dumb blonde get into college?
A: She applies to Delaware State.
Q: Why should the Delaware Fightin Blue Hens change their uniforms to Orange?
A: So they can play the game, direct traffic, and pick up trash without changing.
Q: What's the one thing that keeps Blue Hens basketball players from graduating?
A: Going to Class.
Q: Why did the Blue Hens football team cross the road?
A: Because it was easier than crossing the goal line.
Q: How is a Delaware State girl different from a bowling ball?
A: Sometimes a bowling ball is hard to pick up.
Q: What do Wesley College grads use for Birth Control?
A: Their personalities.
Q: How do you break a Delaware State grads finger?
A: Punch him in the nose.
Q: How do you get a Delaware State fan to laugh all weekend long?
A: Tell him a joke Monday morning.
Q: Why do Delaware State fans smell so bad?
A: So blind people can hate them too.
Q: Why did Delaware change their field from grass to artificial turf?
A: To keep the Blue Hens cheerleaders from grazing the field at halftime.
Q: Did you hear that 9 out of 10 coeds are good looking?
A: The other one goes to Delaware State.
Q: What do they call students at University of Delaware?
A: Rejects from the Ivy League.
Q: Whats the difference between Newark and yogurt?
A: Yogurt has an active living culture.
Q: Why do the Delaware Fightin Blue Hens eat cereal straight from the box?
A: They choke whenever they get near a bowl.
Q: What's the difference between the Delaware Stadium and a cactus?
A: The cactus has its pricks on the outside.
Q: What separates a good team from a great team?
A: The Maryland-Delaware border.
Q: How do you confuse a Delaware State student?
A: You can't they were born that way.
Q: How do you get from Maryland to Storrs?
A: Go east until you smell shit and south until you step in it.
Q: What will you never hear a Delaware State grad say?
A: "I have reviewed your application......"
Q: What do they call students who go to Delaware?
A: Rejects from Wesley College!
Q: What do Delware and Wesley College students have in common?
A: They both got in to University of Delaware!
Q: What's the difference between an Delaware football player and a dollar?
A: You can get four quarters out of a dollar.
Q: Did you hear that Delaware's football team doesn't have a website?
A: They can't string three "Ws" together.
Q: How many Delaware Fighting Blue Hens does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. Lava lamps don't burn out man!
Q: What are the best four years of an University of Delware grads life?
A: Third grade
Q: What does a Delaware native and a bottle of beer have in common?
A: They're both empty from the neck up.
Q: What do tornadoes and graduates from Delaware State have in common?
A: They both end up in trailer parks.
Q. How do they separate the men from the boys in Delaware?
A. With a restraining order.
Q. What's the first thing an Delaware girl does when she wakes up in the morning?
A. Walks home.
Q: What do you call an Delaware State football player with a championship ring?
A: A thief!
Q: What happened after Christine O'Donnell won the Republican primary as a tea party candidate?
A: Sales of tin foil hats and brooms skyrocketed!
Q: What happened when Democrats heckled Christine O'Donnell at a debate?
A: Those that laughed instantly turned into frogs!
Q: Why does Christine O'Donnell go through so many campaign treasurers (5 in 2 years)?
A: Because they all refused to deduct her broomstick mileage as a campaign expense!
Cemetary
One Day This Kid And His Mom Were Walking Past A Cemetery When They Past A Grave And the Kid Stopped To Read It.
He Read Aloud "Here Lies A Delaware State Graduate And A Great Man."
The Kid Then Says "Mom I Dont Get It."
The Mom Says "Why Not?"
The Kid Says "Why Are there 2 People Burried here?"
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