Reindeer Jokes
Short Reindeer Jokes
What does Rudolph want for Christmas?
A pony sleigh station!
Which of Santa's reindeer has bad manners?
"Rude"-olph!
What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?
"Horn"-aments!
Why did the reindeer wear sunglasses to the Christmas party?
Because he didn't want to be recognised!
How can Santa's sleigh possibly fly through the air?
You would too if you were pulled by flying reindeer!
What would a reindeer do if it lost its tail?
She'd go to a "re-tail" shop for a new one!
Why did Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer cross the road?
Because he was tied to a chicken!
What's red and green and guides Santa's sleigh?
Rudolph the red-nosed pickle!
Did you hear that one of Santa's reindeer also works as a maid?
Yup! Comet cleans sinks!
What do you call a blind reindeer?
No eye deer (no idea)
What do you call a reindeer with three eyes?
Reiiindeer
Why do reindeer wear fur coats?
Because they look silly in snowsuits!
Which reindeer has the cleanest antlers?
Comet!
Why is Prancer always wet?
Because he's a "rain"-deer!
Did Rudolph go to a regular school?
No, he was "elf"-taught!
Why is a reindeer like a gossip?
Because they are both tail bearers!
Why do reindeer wear fur coats?
Because they would look silly in plastic macs!
When should you give reindeer milk to a baby?
When its a baby reindeer!
Why does Scrooge love all of the reindeer?
Because every buck is dear to him!
Which of Santa's reindeer has bad manners?
"Rude"-olph!
What do you call a reindeer wearing ear muffs?
Anything you want because he can't hear you!
What do reindeer always say before telling you a joke?
This one will "sleigh" you!
How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming?
He looks at his calen-"deer"!
Where do the reindeer like to stop for lunch?
"Deery" Queen!
What do you give a reindeer with an upset tummy?
"Elk"-a-seltzer!
How do you get into Donner's house?
You ring the "deer"-bell!
Why is Prancer always wet?
Because he's a "rain"-deer!
What's red and white and gives presents to gazelles?
Santelope!
How many reindeer does it take to change a light bulb?
Eight! One to screw in the light bulb and seven to hold Rudolph down!
Reindeer Bar Jokes
Antlers
According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, while both male and female reindeer grow antlers in the summer each year, male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, usually late November to mid-December. Female reindeer retain their antlers till after they give birth in the spring.
Therefore, according to EVERY historical rendition depicting Santa's reindeer, EVERY single one of them, from Rudolph to Blitzen, had to be a girl.
We should've known... ONLY women would be able to drag a fat jolly old man in a red velvet suit all around the world in one night and not get lost.
Santa
One day, Santa saw a young deer with a glowing nose of red...he smiled at him and waved to young creature.
The deer dropped his bottle of gin and exclaimed "Oh Sh!t...it's Santa!" And ran away.
Santa rubbed his beard and shook his head. "I think I'll call that one Rude-off."
How do You?
A student named Jacob was sitting in class one day and the teacher walked by and he asked her "How do you put an elephant in the fridge?"
The teacher said "I don't know, how?"
Jacob then said "You open the door and put it in there!"
Then Jacob asked the teacher another question "How do you put a reindeer in the fridge?"
The teacher then replied "Ohh I know this one, you open the door and put it in there?"
Jacob said "No, you open the door, take the elephant out, and then you put it in there."
Then he asked another question..."All the animals went to the lions birthday party, except one animal, which one was it?"
The teacher a bit confused and said "The lion?"
Then the student said "No,the reindeer because he's still in the fridge."
then he asked her just one more question...."If there is a river full of crocodiles and you wanted to get across it,how would you"
The teacher then says "You would walk over the bridge."
Then Jacob says "No, you would swim across because all the crocodiles are at the lions birthday party!"
She laughs and walks away.
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