Mosquito Jokes



Who do you call when Zika mosquitoes attack?
The SWAT team.

What do you get if you cross the Lone Ranger with an insect?
The Masked-quito!

What has antlers and sucks blood?
A moose-quito!

What is a mosquito's favorite sport?
Skin-diving!

What's the difference between a lawyer and a mosquito?
A mosquito drops off you when you die!

Why are mosquitos religious?
They prey on you!

Why did the mosquito go to the dentist?
To improve his bite!

How do you know if you have a tough mosquito?
You slap him and he slaps you back!

What is the most religious insect?
A mosque-ito!

What has 6 legs, bits and talks in code?
A morese-quito!

What's the difference between a Blonde and a Mosquito?
When you slap a mosquito it stops sucking.

What is the difference between a mosquito and a fly?
Try sewing buttons on a mosquito!

What's the difference between a Mosquito and a fly?
A mosquito can fly, but a fly but a fly can't mosquito!

Movies
A man in a movie theater notices what looks like a mosquito sitting next to him.
"Are you a mosquito?" asked the man, surprised.
"Yes."
"What are you doing at the movies?"
The mosquito replied, "Well, I liked the book."

Knock knock
Who's there?
Amos
Amos who?
Amosquito

Knock knock
Who's there?
Anna
Anna who?
Annother mosquito

Boy Girl Mosquitoes
Once a boy was killing mosquitoes.
The Girl Asked Him "How many mosquitoes have you killed?"
He replied "3 female and 2 male."
She asked "How did you know that they were male or female?"
He replied:"3 were siting in front of the mirror and the 2 were sitting on the treadmill."

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