Fox Jokes
Q: What do you call a fox with a carrot in each ear?
A: Anything you want as he can't hear you!
Q: What did the grape say when the fox stood on it?
A: Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Q: Why did the fox cross the road?
A: To prove to the possum that it could be done!
Q: When does a fox go "moo"?
A: When it is learning a new language!
Q: Did you hear about the veterinarian who learned to talk with foxes?
A: She was crazy like a fox.
Q: When do you have to dance like a fox?
A: When your doing the fox trot.
Q: How do you become the coach of the Chicago Bears?
A: Be sly as a Fox.
Q: What do you call a fox that can pick up an elephant ?
A: Sir!
Q: Did you hear about the shapeshifter that met Medusa?
A: She's now a stone cold fox.
I've been fox hunting again, or stalking as my ginger ex-girlfriend calls it.
Fox Pick Up Lines
Can I borrow your cellphone? I need to call animal control cause I just saw a fox!
Girl, if you were a dinosaur, you'd be a Foxasaurus
If I was a fox, I'd jump in your hole!
It's hunting season and fox like you shouldnt be out in the open!
The Wife
A guy brings a fox home , tells his wife it's a pet.
She asks , "Where are you going to keep it?"
He repies , "In the bedroom."
"But what about that horrible nasty smell?' , she asks.
"I got used to you , I'm sure he will too!"
Religious Cowboy
The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range.
Three weeks later, a fox walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth.
The cowboy couldn't believe his eyes.
He took the precious book out of the foxes mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, "It's a miracle!"
"Not really," said the fox. "Your name is written inside the cover."
Nasty Little Boy
A policeman caught a nasty little boy with a bb gun in one hand and a fox in the other.
"Now Listen here," the policeman said,
"Whatever you do to that poor, defenseless creature I shall personally do to you"
"In that case," said the boy.
"I'll kiss it's butt and let it go"
Night of Drinking
A man and his pet fox walk into a bar. It's about 5pm, but they're ready for a good night of drinking.
They start off slowly, watching TV, drinking beer, eating peanuts. As the night goes on they move to mixed drinks, and then shooters, one after the other.
Finally, the bartender says: "Last call."
So, the man says, "One more for me... and one more for my fox."
The bartender sets them up and they shoot them back. Suddenly, the fox falls over dead.
The man throws some money on the bar, puts on his coat and starts to leave.
The bartender, yells: "Hey buddy, you can't just leave that lyin' there."
To which the man replies: "That's not a lion, that's a fox."
Movies
A man in a movie theater notices what looks like a fox sitting next to him.
"Are you a fox?" asked the man, surprised.
"Yes."
"What are you doing at the movies?"
The fox replied, "Well, I liked the book."