Ant Jokes
Why was the baby ant confused?
Because all his uncles were ants.
What do you call an ant with five pairs of eyes?
Antteneye!
What do you call an and with frogs legs?
An antphibian!
What do you call an ant that won't go away?
Permanant
Why did the ant fall off the toilet seat?
Because he was pissed off.
What kind of ants are very learned?
Pedants!
What do you call an ant who can't speak?
A mutant (mute ant).
Why did the ant cross the road?
Because he needed to buy deodorant!
What did the pink panther say when he stepped on the ant?
deadant deadant deadant deadant.
What do you call a well-dressed ant?
Elegant!
If three ants are lost in a jungle. Who do u call to find them?
The Minister of finance.(find-ants)
What do you call an ant who can't play the piano?
Discordant!
What kind of ant is good at maths?
An accountant!
Where do ants go for their holidays?
Frants!
What do you call an ant who skips school?
A truant!
What do you get if you cross some ants with some tics?
All sorts of antics!
What do you call an ant in space?
Cosmonants & Astronants!
What medicine would you give an ill ant?
Antibiotics!
What is smaller than an ant's dinner?
An ant's mouth!
What do you call an ant who lives with your great uncle?
Your great-ant!
Who was the most famous ant scientist?
Albert Antstein!
What games to ants play with elephants?
Squash!
What do you call an ant who can't find his way back home?
Incogniz-ant
Why are ants bad at spelling?
They only know Conson-ants
What do you call a 100 year old ant?
An antique!
What kind of ant can you colour with?
A crayant!
What do you call an ant who likes to be alone?
An independant
Who is the most famous French ant?
Napoleant!
What do you call an ant with lots of bling?
Extravag-ant
Did you hear about the ant that wasn't allowed in the Catholic Church?
He was Protest-ant.
Why did the ant-elope?
Nobody gnu!
What do you call an ant running away with another ant?
Antelope.
What do ants eat for breakfast?
Croiss-ants
What do you call an ant that doesn't eat cake?
Queen Ant-oinette
What is the biggest ant in the world?
An elephant!
Why don't anteaters get sick?
Because they are full of antibodies!
Where do ants go to eat?
At a restaurant!
What do you call an ant dipped in chocolate?
Decad-ant
Did you hear about the ant that was good at solving quadratic equations?
He was brill-ant.
How do you know if an ant is a male or a female.
They would call them uncles if they were males.
I felt so guilty after I stepped on that ant this morning. You should of seen him, he looked genuinely crushed.
Religious Cowboy
The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range.
Three weeks later, a colony of ants walked up to him carrying the Bible on their backs.
The cowboy couldn't believe his eyes.
He took the precious book from the ants, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, "It's a miracle!"
"Not really," said the ants. "Your name is written inside the cover."
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