"All week, Hillary Clinton has been saying that she has no intention of running for president. See, this is kind of like her version of 'I did not have sexual relations with that woman.' "
-- Jay Leno
"Hillary Clinton told Time magazine that she sympathizes with Martha Stewart because they're friends. Apparently, Martha used to come by the Oval Office once a week to try to get the stains out."
-- Jay Leno
"Hillary said that after Bill admitted the affair with Monica he would spend time alone with Buddy, the dog. He would spend all his time with Buddy the dog. At least that's how he told her he got those scratches on his back."
"Bob Dole and Bill Clinton did a point/counterpoint segment on '60 Minutes' and both of them brought their own sponsors. Bob Dole of course had Viagra and Clinton had Dupont Stain Master Carpets."
-- Jay Leno
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