What was the snowboarders last words?
Hey dude, watch this!
What is the difference between a snowboarding instructor and a snowboarding student?
3 days
What do you call a snowboarding instructor with no girlfriend/boyfriend?
Homeless
What do snowboarders order from Fast Food Restaurants?
Icebergs with chilli sauce.
What do you call a gangsta snowboarder?
Froze-T
How do you know if there's a snowboarding instructor in your bed?
You wake up wet!
What is a snowboarders favorite game?
Ice Spy with my little eye...
What do snowboarders do when they're really talented?
GoPro.
How does a snowboarder deliver his messages?
By Air Mail.
Did you hear about the snowboarder who broke his elbow?
It was rather humerus.
What kind of veggie likes to snowboard?
A Flying Tomato.
How many snowboarding instructors does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, snowboarding instructors don't screw in lightbulbs, they screw in hot tubs.
Why does toilet paper like snowboarding?
Because its the fastest way to get to the bottom.
What instrument does a snowboarder play?
Air Guitar.
Why don't snowboarders shop at Big Lots?
Because they prefer Ollie's.
What do you call a poorly constructed snowboarding course?
A half-assed pipe.
Why did the snowboarder want a divorce?
Because he thought his wife was a flake
S.P.O.R.E.
: Stupid Person On Rental Equipment
I like big dumps and I can not lie / You other brothers can't deny.
I heard fresh dumps turn Lindsey on (Vonn).
A never-ever on the slopes is a yard sale waiting to happen.
Learning how to snowboard is just half-pipe the battle.
Ski Lodge
Three snowboarders go to a ski lodge, and there aren't enough rooms, so
they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, the guy on
the right wakes up and says,
"I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a hand job!"
The guy on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he's had the same
dream, too.
Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says,
"That's funny, I dreamed I was skiing!"