Q. When does John McCain usually go to bed?
A. Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.
Q. Why is John McCain running for President?
A. It was at the top of his bucket list.
Q. How do you spell the name of the next boss of the United States of America? John Mcain, John Macain, John Mccane, Jon Mccain or John McCain?
A. Cindy McCain.
Q. What did John McCain say when his plane was shot down over enemy lines?
A. Curse you, Red Baron!
Q. Why did John McCain take so long to release his medical records?
A. The archeologists had to find them all first.
Q. When did John McCain decide that he believed in the theory of Global Warming?
A. Right after he got confused while adjusting his office thermostat and set temperature too high.
Q: Why is McCain far more knowledgeable and experienced than Barack Obama when it comes to Islamic nations?
A: McCain fought there during the crusades!
Q. Hillary Clinton wears boxers. Bill Clinton wears briefs. Barack Obama wears thongs. What does John McCain wear?