They Think It's all Over after he took over as host:
"They did 19 series and then I did one and they cancelled it."
I was told by the doctor that I was infertile and I couldn't have children, 3 weeks after that he told me that my girlfriend was pregnant....who's the daddy?
I was on a phone call with the HSBC and they said when are you gonna pay off this overdraft? I said you know what outside southeast asia its rude to call people up and ask them for money!