Back to: More Single Liners
The Wisdom of Homer J. Simpson
"Now son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for Daddy's,
and kids with fake IDs."
"Marge,
it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen."
"Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things
is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the
weasel."
"If you really want
something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce
the lottery numbers."
"To
alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems!"
"I want to share something with
you - the three sentences that will get you through life. Number one, 'cover for
me.' Number two, 'oh, good idea, boss.' Number three, 'it was like that when I
got there.'"
"Don't let
Krusty's death get you down, boy. People die all the time.Just like that. Why,
you could wake up dead tomorrow. Well, good night."
"Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not
whether youwin or lose: it's how drunk you get."
"Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You
just go inevery day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way."
"We live in a society of laws. Why
do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well I
didn't hear anybody laughin', did you?"
By Comix
Joke Generators:
Click Here for a random Pick Up Line
Click Here for a random Yo Mama Joke
Click Here for a random Dirty Joke
Click Here for a random Ethnic Joke
Click Here for a random Blonde Joke
Click Here for a random Knock Knock Joke
Click Here for a Random Joke (all other categories)
|
|
Click Here to Bookmark Jokes4us.com 
