They don't sell tickets, they sell chances.
All the insurance machines in the terminal are sold out.
Before the flight, the passengers get together and elect a
pilot.
You can't board the plane unless you have the
exact change.
Before you take off, the stewardess tells
you to fasten your Velcro.
The Captain asks all the
passengers to chip in a little for gas.
When they pull
the steps away, the plane starts rocking.
The Captain
yells at the ground crew to get the cows off the runway.
You ask the Captain how often their planes crash and he
says, "Just once."
No movie. Don't need one. Your life
keeps flashing before your eyes.
You see a man with a
gun, but he's demanding to be let off the plane.
All the
planes have both a bathroom and a chapel.