Chain Sex Joke
TO MY DEAR GIRLFRIEND (WIFE):
During the past
year I have tried to make love to you 365
times.
I have succeeded
36 times, which is an average of once every
ten days.
The following
is a list of why I did not succeed more often:
54 times the sheets were clean
17 times it was too late
49 times you were too tired
20 times it was too hot
15 times you pretended to be asleep
22 times you had a headache
17 times you were afraid of waking the
baby
16 times you said you were too
sore
12 times it was the wrong time
of the month
19 times you had to get
up early
9 times you said weren't in
the mood
7 times you were
sunburned
6 times you were watching
the late show
5 times you didn't want
to mess up your new hairdo
3 times
you said the neighbors would hear us
9 times you said your mother would hear us
Of the 36
times I did succeed, the activity was not satisfactory because:
6 times you just laid there
8 times you reminded me there's a crack
in thecceiling
4 times you told me to
hurry up and get it over with
7 times
I had to wake you and tell you I finished
1 time I was afraid I had hurt you
because I felt you move