A man goes skydiving for
the first time. After listening to the instructor for
what seems like days, he is ready to go. Excited, he jumps out of
the airplane.
About five seconds later, he pulls the ripcord. Nothing happens. He
tries again.
Still nothing. He starts to panic, but remembers his back-up chute.
He pulls
that cord. Nothing happens. He frantically begins pulling both
cords, but to no
avail.
Suddenly, he looks down and he can't believe his eyes. Another man
is in the air
with him, but this guy is going *up*! Just as the other guy passes
by, the
skydiver - by this time scared out of his wits - yells, "Hey,
do you know
anything about skydiving?"
The other guy yells back, "Fuck no! Do you know anything about
lighting gas
stoves?"