Library Jokes


Read your book. Upside down.

Every time the person next to you turns the page, make a strange sound, or a beep.

Act like you�re picking your nose. And eating it.

Read out loud attempting to pronounce easy words. Butcher them badly. But be able to pronounce hard words.

Bring a recording of a popular song. Play it on headphones quietly, but sing along very badly. Then say to the person next to you, "I took singing lessons!"

Instead of a laptop, bring your entire computer!

Suddenly grasp your heart, let out a wail, and fall to the ground. Then get back up like nothing happened.

Start arguing with yourself. When they ask you who you are talking to, say, "Your just jealous �cause the voices are talking to ME!!!"

Bring a bottle of glue and sniff it while counting down from a very high number. When they ask what you�re doing, say, "I�m counting my brain cells!"

Maintain a look of horror constantly, but act normal other wise.

Get a child�s book like "Green Eggs and Ham" and complain that there is no glossary.

Find a thesaurus and say in complete astonishment, "Wow! Did you know that �affirmative� and �yes� mean the same thing?"


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