Pear Jokes

Pear Short Jokes

What do you call a fruity pop star?
Katy Peary.

Where do fruits go on vacation?

What do you get when you add fruit to your salad?
The Perfect Pear.

What did the pear say to the pear pie?
"You've got some crust."

Do fruits go to heaven?
Only if the can get past the pear-ly gates.

What did the pear say to the almond?
You're Nuts!

How do you perform fruity magic?
First you make a fruit disap-pear then you make it reap-pear.

What did one maggot say to the other who was stuck in an pear?
Worm your way out of that one, then!

Why didn't the two worms go into Noah's ark in a fruit?
Because everyone had to go in pairs (pears)!

What lives in pears and is an avid reader?
A bookworm !

What did the fruit say to his girlfriend?
We make a nice pear.

Why did the guy order a fruity drink?
Pear Pressure.

What do you call a run in with a fruity ghost?
A Pear-anormal experience.

What kind of fruit helps a lawyer?
A Pearalegal.

Why did the pear stop in the middle of the road?
Because he ran out of juice.

What do you call an island with dozens of fruit trees?

Dad, do you like baked pears? Yes son, why?
The orchard's on fire.

How many grams of protein are in an pear pie?

What can a whole pear do that half an pear can't do?
It can look round.

First pear: You look down in the dumps. What's eating you?
Second pear: Worms, I think.

If you think corn is stalking you, then you might be a little pearanoid.

What happened after the fruit fell off the counter?
It became pearalyzed.

Pear Bar Jokes

School lunches are not generally popular with those that have to eat them, and sometimes with good reason.
"What kind of pie do you call this ?" asked one schoolboy indignantly.
"What's it taste of ?" asked the cook.
"Then it's pear pie, the plum pie tastes of soap."

At lunch time in the cafeteria there was a pile of pears on a tray, and the teacher put a note: take only one, remember, god is watching.
A little bit further down the line there was a pile of cookies, and a child had put a note on it: take as many as you want, god is watching the pears.

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