Subaru Jokes


Q: What's the difference between a Subaru and the principal's office?
A: It's less embarrassing if your friends see you leaving the principal's office.

Q: Why do they put sidewalks beside most streets and highways?
A: So Subaru owners have a safe place to walk home.

Q: What's the difference between a Subaru and a Porcupine?
A: When it comes to a Subaru, the prick is on the inside.

Q: Why do they fit ABS braking systems to the latest Subarus?
A: So the driver can stop quicker to pick up the fallen off parts.

Q: How do you make a Subaru go faster downhill?
A: Turn off the engine.

Q: What is the difference between a Subaru and a shopping trolley?
A: A shopping trolley is much easier to push.

Q: Why are the latest Subarus so aerodynamically designed?
A: It improves the Chevy towe truck's fuel consumption.

Q: What is the aim of a Subaru project car?
A: An attempt to keep their car running.

Q: What is the difference between a Subaru and a tampon?
A: A tampon comes with it's own tow rope.

Q: Why are Subaru dealers giving away a dog with each Subaru sold?
A: So the owner has a companion to walk home with.

Q: How do you double the value of a Subaru Icon?
A: Full the tank with petrol.

Q: What did the Toyota say to the Subaru?
A: Would you like a tow home?

Q: What do you call a Subaru at the top of a Hill?
A: A Miracle.

Q: What did the BMW say to the Subaru on the side of the road?
A: Rust-in-peace.

Q: What do you call two Subarus at the top of a hill?
A: A mirage.

Q: What's the difference between a golfball and a Subaru?
A: A golf ball can be driven 300 yards.

Q: What do you call a Subaru with dual exhausts?
A: A wheelbarrow

Q: What is the Subaru owner's most ardent wish?
A: To buy a car.

Q: What do you call a Subaru with a seat belt?
A: A rucksack.

Want to hear a car joke?
Subaru Outback.

What should you do if you find three Subaru owners buried up to their neck in cement?
Get more cement.

What's the difference between a Subaru owner and a carp?
One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.

According to a new poll 91 percent of people are satisfied with their lives.
The other 9 percent own a Subaru.

Subaru Acronyms

Subaru: Souped Up Bad Ass Racing Unit
Souped Up Blazingly Awesome Racing Unit

Subaru Mottos

"That's not a leak. My Subaru's just marking it's territory."
"You might own a Subaru if you keep getting sympathy cards from the dept of transport."
"I could never keep a Subaru under me, I was always under the Subaru."
"Friends don't let friends drive Subarus."


Strongest Man
A guy walks into a biker bar and demands to know "Who's the strongest man in here?"
A tough looking guy goes over to him and says "I am the strongest around here!"
The other guy politely asks "Can you help me push my Subaru to the gas station?"

Subaru Car Salesmen
Two Subaru car salesmen were sitting at the bar.
One complained to the other, "Boy, business sucks. If I don't sell more Subaru's this month, I'm going to lose my fucking ass!"
Too late - he noticed a beautiful blonde, sitting two stools away. Immediately, he offered apologies for his use of bad language.
"That's okay," the blonde replied, "I have a very similar problem ... If I don't sell more ass this month, I'm going to lose my fucking Subaru!"

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