Starbucks Short Jokes
If you say "Pumpkin Spice Latte" into a mirror three times, a white girl in yoga pants will appear and tell you all her favorite things about fall.
Why is Starbucks removing the trans-fat from their menu?
Because they want that Frappacino to pad your ass without clogging your arteries!
Why is Starbucks promising their customers "Your drink should be perfect every time. If not, let us know and we'll make it right."?
To torture their employees
How did Federal Authorities figure out that there is a complex underground drug smuggling tunnel near the US-Mexico border?
It had it's own Starbucks!
What did the doctor say when a baby was born holding a Starbucks latte?
"Its a white girl."
What do you call a Frappuccino that won't stop brewing?
Stand your ground coffee.
What's the only coffee that aliens will buy?
Where does Santa and his reindeer go to get hot chocolate while flying in the sky?
What is the new Starbucks sponsored Paul McCartney song?
Latte it Be!
Why can Starbucks get away with charging outrageous prices for coffee?
Because they have Italian titles for everything!
What is the difference between a Starbucks latte and a whore?
Nothing, they both suck and empty your wallet!
Starbucks or Victoria Secrets?.....Who charges more per cup?
Yo mama so stupid she thought Starbucks was alien currency
Starbucks Bar Jokes
Starbucks coffee chain that has been feeling the pinch of a tightening economy says it will close 600 stores, which is about 8.5% of its 7,100 total stores.
In related news, the soccer mom and gay suicide rate will increase about 8.5%.
A man died and went to straight down to hell. The devil greeted him and gave him a guided tour of the place. He told the man that there were three rooms he could chose from in which to spend eternity.
The first room was full of flames so hot the man couldn't even breathe. He told the devil that there was no way he was choosing that room. So they moved on.
The next room they came to was full of people who were being beaten and tortured. It looked so painful the man could not watch. He told the devil he definitely didn't want that room, and they moved on.
The last room they came to was full of people who were just sitting around drinking coffee and relaxing. The only thing was that they were standing around in about two feet of poop. The man looked for a while and then told the devil this room would be all right.
The devil gestured for him to sit down and the man took a seat. He did, sipped his coffee and felt really pleased with his choice. After a ew minutes, a voice came over the loudspeaker and said, "Break time is over! Time for another 1,000 push-ups!"