Q: How do you make a hormone?
A: Stick a rusty fucking chainsaw up her cunt.
Q: What do you call kids born in whorehouses?
A: Brothel sprouts.
Q: How do you get a whore pregnant?
A: Cum on her shoes and let the flies do the rest.
Q: What do you get when you cross a whore with a systems engineer?
A: A fuckin know-it-all!
Q: Did you hear about the whore that had her appendix taken out?
A: Now she does business on the side!
Q: Who makes more money a drug dealer or a whore?
A: A hooker because she can wash her crack and reuse it.
Q: What do you call a Serbian whore?
A: Sloberdown Mycockyoubitch
Q: What does bungee jumping and whores have in common?
A: They both cost a hundred bucks and if the rubber breaks, you're screwed.
Q: Did you hear about the Chinese whore that had a black baby?
A: She named him Sum Ting Wong!
Q: Why do Jewish men like to watch porno movies backward?
A: They like the part where the whore gives the money back.
Q: How many cops does it take to push a whore down the stairs?
A: None "She fell"
Q: What's the difference between an epileptic oyster fisherman, and a whore with diahrrea?
A: Well, one shucks between fits.
Q: What do you tell a whore with 2 black eyes?
A: Nothing. You've already told her twice!
Q: Why did the whore fall out of the tree?
A: Because, she was dead!
Q: What do you call a whore with no legs?
A: A nightcrawler!
Q: What does bungee jumping and whores have in common?
A: They both cost a hundred bucks and if the rubber breaks, you’re screwed.
Q: What's the difference between your job and a Dead Whore?
A: Your job still sucks!
Q: What's the difference between a whore and a bitch?
A: Whore's fuck everyone at the party, Bitches fuck everyone at the party except you.
Q: What's the difference between Jello and a Dead Whore?
A: Jello wiggles when you eat it!
Q: What's the difference between a Dead Whore in the road and a dead dog in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dead dog!
Q: What's the difference between a Corvette and a dead whore?
A: I don't have a Corvette in my garage!
Q: What do you do if your whore is running around screaming and bleeding in your hotel room?
A: Shoot her again!
Q: What's the difference between an onion and a whore?
A: You don't cry when you chop up a hooker!
Q: If a new whore uses vasoline, what does an old whore use?
A: An old whore uses poly-grip!
Q: Why do Republican politicians never conduct business on the same street where a whore is working?
A: Professional courtesy!
Q: What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a whore?
A: Tiger can work his balls both ways!
Q: How bad is the California economy?
A: Even the whores are taking I.O.U's
Q: Why does Tiger play a round of golf with a whore?
A: To get a hairy hole in one.
Q: Did you know that O.J. Simpson, Monica Lewinsky, Ted Kennedy, and President Bill Clinton are all avid golfers?
A: O.J.'s a slicer, Monica's a whore, Ted Kennedy can't drive over water, and Clinton can't seem to hit the right hole!
Two Dwarfs
Two dwarfs go into a bar, where they pick up two whores and take them to their separate hotel rooms.
The first dwarf, however, is unable to get a stiffy. His depression is enhanced by the fact that, from the next room, he hears cries of, "ONE, TWO, THREE...UUUUH!" all night long.
In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first, "How did it go?"
The first whispered back, "It was so embarrassing. I just couldn't get a hard on."
The second dwarf shook his head. "You think that's embarrassing?" he asked. "I couldn't even get on the bed!!!"
First Pussy
This guy was walking down the street and this streetwalker says, "Say, wanna have a good time?" "Sure," he says and they were off to the nearest motel.
She takes off her clothes and he keeps staring at her. She says, "Is this the first pussy you seen since you crawled out of one?" The guy says,
"Nope, just the first one I've seen big enough to crawl back into."
One Hot Night
A young man and his hot date were parked on a back road some distance from town. They were about to have sex when the girl stopped.
"I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I'm actually a whore and I charge $20 for sex." The man reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing.
After a cigarette, the man just sat in the driver's seat looking out the window. "Why aren't we going anywhere?" asked the girl.
"Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I'm actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25..."
Smell It In The Air
Two hookers were standing on a street corner ready for a night of business.
"It's gonna be a good night tonight, I can tell" says one of the girls.
"How can you tell?" says the other.
"I can smell cock in the air" replies the first hooker.
"Sorry", her friend replied, " I just burped!"
Worlds Oldest Profession
One day a hooker went to file her taxes, and for occupation she put whoring.
The tax collector explained that whoring was an illegal occupation.
She said she'd have to go home and think about it and that she'd call him back in a hour with her occupation.
An hour later she called him and said, "I've got it... I'm a chicken farmer."
He said, "How do you get chicken farmer out of whoring."
She said, "I raised over a thousand cocks last year."
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