Pope Benedict XVI Jokes

Q: What do you call Pope Benedict XVI after his last day?
A: Ex Benedict.

Q: If Pope Benedict XVI wants to fly to the United States which airline does he chose?
A: Virgin Atlantic!

Q: Why was Pope Benedict XVI relieved after a woman knocked him down at St. Peter's Basilica in Rome?
A: He thanked god she wasn't Elin Woods!

Q: Why did Pope Benedict XVI, who was once part of the Nazi Youth, condemn Israel for attacking Hezbollah?
A: Because the Middle East problem needs to be solved and when Jews defend themselves, it takes longer to find a final solution!

Q: What did the Pope say to the woman who jumped over barricades, tackled the pope, and fell on top of him?
A: "Wait, your not an altar boy!"

Q: Why was Pope Benedict XVI not allowed to fly into the United States?
A: He wanted to bring more than 3 oz of holy water with him!

Q: What will happen if Pope Benedict XVI (age 81) gets any older?
A: He will become the Republican nominee for President!

Q: What happened when the Pope splashed some Holy Water on Dick Cheney?
A: He began to burn!

Q: Why didn't Pope Benedict XVI attend a lavish White House state dinner when he was in the United States?
A: Because President Bush went out of his way to make is a Kosher meal!

Q: What did President ask Muslims to think about before protesting against the Pope's insensitve comments against Muslims?
A: What Would Jesus Do (WWJD)!

Q: What new Hollywood film is Pope Benedict XVI promoting while he is in the United States?
A: The 80 Year Old Virgin!

Q: What can you infer after hearing that Pope Benedict XVI had surgery on his wrist after falling at a Alpine vacation chalet?
A: Altar boys are fighting back!

Q: What did the Pope say after being called out at second base during his mass at Yankee Stadium?
A: "Damn, I never make it to 2nd base."

Q: What does the Pope say to young boys at communion?
A: You can't squeal on me with your mouth full, can you!

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