Lebron James Jokes

Q: What's the difference between Lebron James and a tree?
A: A tree has more rings.

Q: How do you know when you've found Lebron James' cell phone?
A: It never rings in Cleveland.

Q: What do LeBron James and a Blonde have in common?
A: They both suck and then get a ring.

Q: How do you know when it's Lebron James' Birthday?
A: Everyone gets to leave work 12 minutes early.

Q: Why do we know Lebron James sold his soul to satan for a ring?
A: He changed his Jersey to the number 6 and won the 66th NBA Finals after a 66 game regular season!

Q: How do you know when it's Lebron James' Birthday?
A: Everyone gets to leave work 12 minutes early.

Lebron's girlfriend said she was leaving him. She was taking her talent to Tim Duncans house. He could put a ring on it!

Q: Why can't Lebron James shop at the dollar store?
A: Because he only has 3 quarters!

Q: How do you know you've found Lebron James' cell phone?
A: It vibrates and receives calls, but doesn't have a ring!

Q: How do you know you've found Lebron James' cell phone?
A: It vibrates and receives calls, but it only has 2 ring!

Q: What time does Lebron James go to sleep?
A: A quarter after 3

Q: What did Matisyahu say to Lebron James?
A: Your not the only king without a crown

Q: Why shouldn't Lebron worry about dislocating his ring finger?
A: It's not like he was planning to use it any time soon!

Q: What do you call a man that has a basketball head?
A: Lebron James with a bad hair line.

Q: What if Lebron James quit basketball and became an actor?
A: It would be a "Trainwreck".

Q: What does a fish and Lebron James have in common?
A: They both flop.

Q: Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar?
A: Lebron will only give you 3 quarters!

Q: What is the difference between Saturn and LeBron?
A: Saturn has rings.

Q. What player is and elite player but has lost the most NBA Finals?
A. LeBronze James

Q: How Many points did Lebron James score against the Jazz?
A: James scored so much, Utah made him an honorary Mormon!

Q: Why did Lebron James choose not to go to College?
A: Lebron likes to avoid the finals!

Q: What's the difference between Tim Tebow and Lebron James?
A: Tim Tebow comes alive in the 4th quarter!

Q: What is the formula for the perfect athlete?
A: Add 3 quarters of Lebron with 1 quarter of Tebow.

Q: What is Webster's new definition of pointless?
A: LeBron James in the 4th quarter!

Q: Why does Lebron James drive an automatic car?
A: He cant handle a clutch.

Q: Why does LeBron only eat boneless buffalo wings?
A: Because he has a tendency to choke

Q: Why does Drew Carey want Lebron James to stay in Cleveland?
A: Because misery loves company!

Q: What's worst than Lebron James hosting Saturday Night Live?
A: Lebron James supporting cast on the Cleveland Cavaliers!

Q: What do you call the three superstars who decided to play together for the Miami Heat next season?
A: The Three Mi-Egos

Q: After extracting a benign growth along his right jaw line what procedure is Lebron James looking to perform?
A: Extracting himself from the Cleveland Cavaliers!

Q: What's the difference between Lebron and your school binder?
A: Rings

Q: What does Lebron have in common with the average NHL player?
A: They both play hard for 3 quarters

Q: If a woman proposed to LeBron, what would he say?
A: Nothing, he chokes up at the sight of a ring.

Q: What did Lebron James eat during his last breakfast in the city of Cleveland?
A: Eggs Benedict Arnold!

Q: Despite Lebron James leaving for the Miami Heat why does Delonte West want to stay in Cleveland?
A: Lebron James' Mom!

Q: Why did Lebron head down South?
A: Because his mother went West!

Q: How does Lebron James know he has a fever?
A: When the number on the thermometer matches the number of people in his entourage!

Q: Why did Lebron James & Chris Bosh decide to play for the Miami Heat?
A: The Mayor of South Beach recently declared all paternity tests invalid!

Q: Why is Dwayne Wade (3 years at Marquette University) proof that basketball players should stay in school?
A: He recruited Lebron James (no-college) & Chris Bosh (1 year at Georgia Tech) to take less money and play second fiddle to him!

Q: What does Lebron and his dad have in common?
A: They both leave when times get tough!

Q: Why is Lebron James not happy about going down South?
A: Because his mom is heading West!

Q: Why doesn't the apple fall far from the tree?
A: LeBron chokes in the playoffs, his mom chokes on Delonte!

Q: What's the difference between LeBron James and a book?
A: A book has a title.

Q: Why has BP contacted Lebron James about containing the Gulf Oil Spill?
A: Because they want him to clog the pipes with his EGO!

Q: How is your best friend like Lebron James?
A: They both woke up this morning without an NBA championship!

Q: Why are jokes about Lebron's hairline inappropriate?
A: You can't joke about something that doesn't exist?

Q: Why did Lebron sign up for a Discover card?
A: He heard if he got enough points, he could travel for free.

Q: What does it mean when your movie theater requires you to put your cell phone in Lebron mode?
A: No ring

Q: Why doesn't Lebron James shake the hands of the other team after a game?
A: Because they hurt so much from carrying his team all season long!

Q: Why does Lebron's agent want him to play in the National Hockey League (NHL)?
A: Because they only have three periods.

LeBron James' girlfriend is pregnant with the couple's third child
This gives Lebron James the NBA record for most kids with the same woman!

Q: Why did Lebron James have a cancer scare earlier this season?
A: The Cavaliers almost signed Allen Iverson!

Q: What do you call three highly spirited all-stars playing for one team in South Beach?
A: An injury waiting to happen!

Q: Why can't Lebron James write his Auto-Biography?
A: He's still stuck on the title!

Q: What does Lebron James have in common with JCPenny's?
A: Neither carries any hardware.

Q: Why isn't Lebron allowed around small children?
A: He considered a CHOKE Hazard!

Q: What was Skip Bayless' last nightmare about?
A: Lebron James winning an NBA Championship!

Q: Why can't LeBron get with Beyonce?
A: Because he couldn't put a ring on it.

Q: Why did the chinese restaurant shut down?
A: Because like Lebron they couldn't deliver!

Kobe goes up to lebron and says "Hey Lebron want to come to my house and watch a movie?"
And then lebron says "Sure, what movie?"
Then Kobe answers "Lord of the RINGS!"

LeBron: "Kobe I called you last night why didn't you pick up?"
Kobe: "Oh I'm sorry, I only heard it ring once."

Scientists discovered a new particle this week, which, due to its instability, vanishes within 12 minutes. They call it 1 LeBron.

LeBron James went to Miami but he should have went to Jared; he would have a ring by now!

Lebron went South, His Hairline went North, and his mom went West!

If Lebron wants a ring that bad, he should have stayed in Ohio and bought one from Terrell Pryor.

Lebron James was just traded to the Columbus Blue Jackets. He should be wildly successful, since in the NHL, there are only 3 periods

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