Q: Why did Jessica Simpson change her hair color from blonde to red?
A: Because red is easier to spell!
Q: According the Jessica what is Chicken of the Sea?
A: Chicken with gills
Q: What did Jessica actually say (in real life) when being introduced to Interior Secretary Gale Norton when visiting the White House?
A: "You've done a nice job decorating the White House."
Q: What did Jessica Simpson say when she ran into the wall at the lake?
Q. Did you hear Jessica Simpson almost drowned the other day?
A. Someone put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of her pool.
Q: How do you make Jessica Simpson's eyes twinkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in her ear.
Q: Why did Jessica Simpson have tire tread marks on her back?
A: From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON'T WALK".
Q: Why did Jessica Simpson wear condoms on her ears?
A: So she wouldn't get Hearing AIDS
Q: Why did Jessica Simpson stop using the pill?
A: Because it kept falling out.
Q. Why doesnt Jessica get why everyone is mean to her?
A. Jessica dont worry they are all ass wholes that dont noe a good singer when they see one! how dare you all make fun of her!!!
Q: According the Jessica what are buffalo wings made of?
A: Buffalo Kneecaps or arms
Q: Why is Jessica Simpson's brain the size of a pea in the morning?
A: It swells at night.
Q: What did Jessica Simpson do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home?
A: She moved.
Q: Jessica Simpson ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces.
A: "Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."
Q: Whats the proper way to pronounce Platypus?
A: Plata ma pus
Q: According the Jessica what is the plural form of Mouses?
Q: What does Jessica Simpson and door knobs have common?
A: Everyone gets a turn