Chris Brown Jokes


Q: What did Chris Brown say to Rihanna after she got 2 black eyes
A: Nothing....he already told her twice.

Q: A Recent poll state the most women wanted George Clooney to hit on them. Who was the least wanted?
A: Chris Brown

Reporter: "Why are you dating Chris Brown again?"
Rihanna: "Beats Me."

Q: How did Chris Brown plea in the felony assault charge relating to Rihanna?
A: Not Guilty, by way of Celebrity!

Q: How do you fix our economic problems with the help of Chris Brown?
A: Invest all his money in a ponzi scheme and lock him up in jail with Bernie Madoff!

Q: Why is the judge in the Chris Brown case insisting Chris work at a Red Lobster?
A: So he can learn how to batter fish instead of women!

Q: How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
A: She found another woman's lipstick on his knuckles

Q: Why is Chris Brown suing the Charlie Sheen?
A: Because Charlie is replacing him as the biggest celebrity disaster on TV!

Q: Why are most retailers refusing to sell Chris Brown's "Greatest Hits" album?
A: Rihanna is on the cover!

Q: What do you get when you cross A-Rod with Chris Brown?
A: A cheater, cheater, woman beater.

Q: What song was Chris Brown singing when he was choking Rihanna?
A: Jordin Sparks "No Air"!

Q: Why does Chris Brown have red eyes after sex?
A: Pepper spray.

Q: Why did Chris Brown break up with Rihanna?
A: He wanted to be free to hit on other women!

Q: Did you hear that Chris Brown and Rihanna got back together and do you know what he beat her with this time?
A: An Umbrella...ella...ellla...a...

Q: Why is Chris Brown now an advocate of womens rights?
A: Because his knuckles are sore.

Q: How do you know the tough economy is affecting celebrities?
A1: Chris Brown and Rihanna are carpooling again!
A2: Chris Brown and Rihanna are sharing herpes medication!

Q: Who is better at singing: Women or Chris Brown?
A: Women.....that's why he beats them!

Q: Who was Rihanna's ex again?
A: Oh it just hit me.

Q: How many women has Chris Brown beat?
A: 5 at least, cause thats how many different shades of lip stick are on his knuckles.

Q: What is loud and hysterical?
A: Rihanna after Chris Brown beats her!

Q: Why don't hipsters beat their girlfriends?
A: Because Chris Brown made it mainstream.

S1: Over the weekend, Siegfried and Roy performed for the first time since Roy was mauled. That's right - Roy Horn was reunited with the beast that attacked him.
S2: In related news, Rihanna and Chris Brown are back together again.

Q: What does Chris Brown do if the dishwasher stops working?
A: He HITS HER.

What's the difference between Chris Brown and his songs?
His songs hit the top of the Billboard charts, while he hits women.

Nothing beats a beautiful girl with a great singing voice.......except Chris Brown

That awkward moment when a Rihanna song comes on Chris Brown's Pandora station.

I've always wondered what Rihanna ever saw in Chris Brown... Then it hit me.

Shut up before I Tiger Woods your wife, Honey Boo Boo your kid, Michael Vick your dog, and Chris Brown your sister.

Alex Rodriguez couldn't hit Rihanna if he was Chris Brown.

I bet Chris Brown's snooze button takes a motherfucking beating.

Chris Brown cited Michael Jackson as his role model, unfortunately his favourite song was beat it

Chris Brown hits her, Eminem lies to her, Drake can't remember her name = The life of Rihanna.



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