Bernie Madoff Jokes

Q: How did Bernie Madoff get the idea for a ponzi scheme (where you use the money of new investors to pay off the older investors.)
A: Social Security!

Q: How do you get Bernie Madoff to plead guilty?
A: Lock him up with Chris Brown after telling him he lost all his money in a ponzi scheme!

Q: Why should Bernie Madoff learn about insider trading?
A: Because he'll learn soon enought after he goes to jail!

Q: What is the difference between Slumdog Millionaire and Slimeball Millionaire
A: Slimeball Millionaire is a movie about Bernard Madoff. 

Q: How cold is a New York winter?
A: So cold that Bernie Madoff is actually looking forward to burning in hell!

Q: What is congress learning from the Madoff Ponzi scheme (Where you throw good new money after bad)
A: How to craft a new stimulus banking bill!

Q: What Financial Services Award did Bernie Madoff recently win?
A: AIG's man of the year

Q: Why couldn't the government catch the Bernie Madoff ponzi scheme?
A: Because they were too busy tracking Elliot Spitzers hooker money!

Q: Why shouldn't Bernard Madoff be investigated by congress?
A: Because the guy who made 50 billion dollars disappear is being investigated by the guys who made $700 billion dollars disappear!

Q: How do you get a small fortune?
A: Start with a large one like Bernie Madoff!

Q: Why are 13,000 investors mad at Bernie?
A: Because he made off with their money!

Q: Why did Bernie choose the name, "Madoff?" 
A: Because "Ripoff" had already been taken.

Q: When does an investment banker know he has "madit" to the top of his profession? 
A: When He has "madoff" with all his client's money.

Joke Generators: