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Amy Winehouse Jokes


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Q: Why did Amy Winehouse snort artificial sweetener?
A: She thought it was diet coke.

Q: Whats worse than having Britney Spears as a mom?
A: Having Amy Winehouse as a nanny!

Q: What's worth more than a black market kidney or liver?
A: Amy Winehouse's nose hairs!

Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan?
A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!

Q: What's the difference between February and Amy Winehouse?
A: February makes it to 28!

Q: What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson?
A: Nothing, now.

Q. Why does Amy Winehouse have a tattoo of a pocket on her boob?
A. It's where she keeps the tattoo of her keys. 

Q: What is Amy Winehouse's last wish?
A: For all her loved ones to please form a line!

Q: What's more toxic to babies than Chinese milk?
A: Amy Winehouse breastfeeding your kids!

Q: Why was Amy Winehouse's cremated?
A: Police have estimated Amy Winehouse's ashes have a street value of $500,000!

Q: How do you know your playing a tennis match with Amy Winehouse?
A: Your opponent tries to snort the service line!

Q: Amy Winehouse's health is at risk due to her crack problem.
A: Her doctors say that if she doesn't wash it soon, she'll get gangrene.

Singer Amy Winehouse was rushed to a London hospital Monday night.
Apparently she walked naked past a mirror and saw her penis. 

Q: Why was Amy Winehouse being treated for an adverse reaction to medication?
A: Doctor said she had overdosed on fresh air. 

Q: Amy Winehouse just received the starring role in what movie?
A: Fraggle Rock: The Movie

Q: What will Amy Winehouse do with her 5 grammy awards?
A: Sell them on Ebay to buy crack!

Q: What’s the difference between Amy Winehouse and Amy Winehouse jokes?
A: The jokes will get old.

Q: What’s the difference between me and Amy Winehouse?
A: Amy has more money, but I woke up on Saturday!

Q: How do men pick up Amy Winehouse?
A: With a stretcher!

Q: How do you know you have upset god?
A: When he sends you to rehab permanently!

Q: What did Amy Winehouse say right before she died?
A: "How about a magic trick? I'm gonna make this line of coke...disappear!"

Q: What have Amy Winehouse and a fly got in common?
A: They’re both six feet.

In world news today Switzerland just medicalised heroin!
In other news, Amy Winehouse is moving to Switzerland!

Q: What did the devil say to Amy Winehouse?
A: Amy you should've went to rehab but you said no, no, no!

Q: Why is Amy Winehouse having fainting spells?
A: Her crack levels are getting low!

Q: What song did Elton John perform at Amy Winehouses funeral?
A: Candle Under The Spoon!

McDonalds have released the Amy Winehouse McValue Meal
It's Just Coke and Ice

Q: How did Amy Winehouse confuse forensic experts?
A: When they drew a line around her body and Amy sprung up and tried to snort it!

Q: What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Jimi Hendrix?
A: Amy Winehouse had more hits before she died!

Q: What does Amy Winehouse and Big Brother beauty Imogen Thomas have in Common?
A: Neither of them will be doing Giggs any time soon!

Q: What do you need to perform an autopsy on Amy Winehouse?
A: A Periodic Table!

Q: Were did amy winehouse pick up her cocaine habit?
A: After being told to do a 100 lines at school!

Q: What do Michael Jackson and Amy Winehouse have in common?
A: They both have a 10 year old crack addiction!

A government group stated that most European paper money is Laced With Cocaine
In related news, Amy Winehouse was seen today entering a bank with a gun and a wheelbarrow.

Q: Which movie starring Amy Winehouse is getting Oscar buzz?
A: "Coke Whore"

Q: What do wrestling fans and Amy Winehouse have in common?
A: The both love the Rock!

Q: What is Amy Winehouse's favorite song?
A: I wanna rock!

Q: What was Amy Winehouse’s biggest hit?
A: Her last one!

When Amy Winehouse died and went to the Pearly Gates,
St. Peter looked at her and said, "No, no, no!"


Amy Winehouse Lyrics

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