Charlotte Bobcats Jokes

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Q: What do you call an Charlotte Bobcats player with a championship ring?
A: A thief.

Q: What's the difference between the Charlotte Bobcats and a dollar bill?
A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.

Q: What do the Charlotte Bobcats and possums have in common?
A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!

Q: What is the difference between a Bobcats fan and a baby?
A: The baby will stop whining after awhile.

Q: How many Charlotte Bobcats players does it take to change a tire?
A: One, unless it's a blowout, in which case they all show up

Q: What do you call 12 millionaires around a TV watching the NBA Finals?
A: The Charlotte Bobcats.

Q: How do you keep an Charlotte Bobcats player out of your yard?
A: Put up a basketball net.

Q: What is a Charlotte Bobcats fan's favorite whine?
A: "We can't beat Boston."

Q: How do you stop an Charlotte Bobcats fan from beating his wife?
A: Dress her in Boston Green and White!

Q: What is th difference between a bucket of shit and an Charlotte Bobcats fan?
A: The bucket.

Q: If you have a car containing a Bobcats power forward, a Bobcats point guard, and a Bobcats center, who is driving the car?
A: The cop.

Q: How do you casterate an Charlotte Bobcats fan?
A: Kick his sister in the mouth

Q: What should you do if you find three Charlotte Bobcats basketball fans buried up to their neck in cement?
A: Get more cement.

Q: What's the difference between an Charlotte Bobcats fan and a carp?
A: One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.

Q. How did the Charlotte Bobcats fan die from drinking milk?
A. The cow fell on him!

Q: What does an Charlotte Bobcats fan do when his team has won the NBA Finals?
A: He turns off the PlayStation 3.

Q: What do you call a Charlotte Bobcat in the NBA Finals?
A: A referee.

Q: Did you hear that Charlotte's basketball team doesn't have a website?
A: They can't string three "Ws" together.

Q: How many Charlotte Bobcats fans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. Lava lamps don�t burn out man!

Q: What does a Charlotte Bobcats fan and a bottle of beer have in common?
A: They�re both empty from the neck up.

Q: Why do Charlotte Bobcats fans keep their season tickets on their dashboards?
A: So they can park in handicap spaces.

Q: How do the Bobcats spend the first week of training camp?
A: Studying the Miranda Rights

Q: How do you keep a Bobcats fan from masterbating?
A: You paint his dick Boston green and white and he won't beat it for 4 years!

Q. Why do ducks fly over Time Warner Cable Arena upside down?
A. There's nothing worth craping on!

Q: Why doesn't South Carolina have a professional basketball team?
A: Because then North Carolina would want one.

Bobcats Fan

A Bobcats fan dies on match day and goes to heaven in his Blue and Orange jersey. He knocks on the old pearly gates and out walks St. Peter.
"Hello mate" says St. Peter, "I'm sorry, no Bobcats fans in heaven."
"What ?" exclaims the man, astonished.
"You heard, no Bobcats fans."
"But, but, but, I've been a good man", replies the Bobcats supporter.
"Oh really", says St. Peter. "What have you done, then ?"
"Well" said the supporter, "Three weeks before I died, I gave 100 dollars to the starving children in Africa".
"Oh" says St.Peter. "anything else?"
"Well, 2 weeks before I died I also gave 100 dollars to the homeless."
"Hmmm. Anything else?"
"Yeah. A week before I died I gave 100 dollars to the Albanian orphans."
"Okay", said St. Peter, "You wait here a minute while I have a word with the god."
Ten minutes pass before St. Peter returns.
He looks the bloke in the eye and says, "I've had a word with God and he agrees with me. Here's your $300 dollars back, now fuck off".

Genie
A Bobcats fan and a Celtics fan stumble upon a magic lamp.
The Bobcats fan gets to it first, picks it up and gives it a rub. There's a flash, a puff of smoke, and a genie appears
The genie looks at the 2 men and demands to know who it was that rubbed the lamp. Delighted, the Bobcats fan announces that it was him.
"Okay," says the genie, "So you get 3 wishes. But there's a catch."
"What's that then?" asks the 'Gers fan.
"Well, whatever you wish for, I'll give the other guy double."
"That's alright with me," says the Bobcats fan, and starts the ball rolling by wishing for a million pounds.
"Granted!" says the genie, "But the Celtics fan gets 2 million."
"Fair enough. Now, I'd like a nice new Ferrari,"
"Done. But the Celtics fan gets 2 Ferraris."
"Okay," says the Bobcats fan, "I'd like to donate a kidney.

Gerald Wallace

Gerald Wallace walks into a sperm donor bank in London...
"I'd like to donate some sperm" he says to the receptionist.
"Certainly Sir" replies the receptionist, "have you donated before?".
"Yes" replies Gerald "you should have my details on your computer".
"Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. Shall I call your wife for you?"
"Why do I need help?" asks Gerald . The receptionist replies
"Well, it says on your record that you're a useless wanker...."

Condoms

What's clear and goes on a prick? A clear condom,
What's black and goes on a prick? A black condom,
What's blue and orange and goes on a prick? A Bobcats Jersey.

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