Oscar 2006 Jokes

Q: How did George Clooney come up with the title for the movie Good Night and Good Luck?
A: It's the way he also ends all of his dates.

Q: Who was this years Million Dollar Baby?
A: Who knows....but I'd ask Angelina Jolie

Q: Why is Capote such a groundbreaking film?
A: It proves that not all gay people are virile cowboys.

Q: Why couldn't Bjork be at this years Oscars?
A: Because she was trying on her Oscar dress and Dick Cheney shot her!

Q: Why did box office patrons go to the movies in 2006?
A: To escape from everyday problems such as Terrorism (Munich), Racism (Crash), Corruption (Capote), and censorship (Good Night Good Luck)

Q: Why is it not fair for a gay cowboy to win an Oscar?
A: Because he was already with one last night!

Q: Why did Heath Ledger and Jake Gyhenhall leave the 2006 Oscars dissapointed?
A: Because the only gifts they received were from the Christian right GooDie bag!

Q: Why is the 2006 Oscars a microcosm of the real world?
A1: Once again the gay left (Brokeback Mountain) lost to a racist right (Crash)!
A2: The best democratic Speech (Clooney) was given in a supporting role (Kerry-Edwards).
A3: At the end of the day everyone just wants to be a pimp (Three 6 Mafia).

Q: Why is the Christian right steamed?
A1: Because people were told that Geishas were the best dressed!
A2: The flamboyant director who tricked 2 straight guys into having sex won.
A3: A gay guy who glorified murder (Capote) was idolized.
A4: None of the above, the Christian right is always steamed.

The Oscars is the one time of year where you can see all your favorite stars at once without paying money to the democratic party
And its fun for the stars as well, this is the only time they can actually vote for a winner.

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