What did the bird say to the racing squirrel?
You walnut beat that!
If 2 nuts on the wall are walnuts then what are two nuts on your upper body? Chestnuts.
What happens when you tell a walnut a good joke?
It cracks up.
What's the difference between walnuts and deer nuts?
Walnuts cost $4 a pound and Deer Nuts are under a buck.
What do you when you make a walnut laugh?
You crack it up.
Squirrels walnut divide us.
Patient: My tongue tingles when I touch it to a cracked walnut wrapped in used toaster oven aluminum foil, what's wrong with me?
Doctor: You have far too much free time.
Broccoli: I look like a tree.
Walnut: I look like a brain.
Mushroom: I look like an umbrella.
Banana: Dude! Change the topic.
The revolution walnut be televised.