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"Experts say with all the media attention centered on the governor's race, it threatens to turn the Kobe Bryant trial into a dignified proceeding." —Craig Kilborn

"Up in New Hampshire the pundits are talking about John Kerry's surge. Apparently, John Kerry is the man to beat now. They're saying this is the biggest come from behind story since Kobe Bryant." —Bill Maher

Tina Fey: "Next month, a flawless $10 million diamond the size of a walnut will go on auction at Sotherby's and just in time -- Kobe Bryant's wife has a birthday coming up.

Kobe's attorneys are on the attack. They said the DNA sample found on the girls underwear wasn't Kobe's. They said it was from a white guy. So, chances are it wasn't even an NBA player." Jay Leno

Kobe Bryant got a technical foul last night. But he says he didn't foul the guy, he says it was consensual. Jay Leno

Yesterday was a huge night for guys. You had the NBA Finals and the Tony Awards. Thank God for Tivo! The Lakers only scored 75 points. Detroit's defense was so good, Kobe tried to hire them as his attorneys. So, the bad news is, looking shaky going for ring four. But the good news is Jennifer Lopez got ring number three." Jay Leno

"Did you see the NBA championship game last night? Boy did those Pistons beat up on the Lakers. That means the only Laker getting a ring this year will be Kobe Bryant's wife. David Letterman

"How about the Detroit Pistons winning the championship. Afterwards, there were fist fights, shattered windows, and that was just in the Lakers locker room. I have good news for you Lakers fans. Kobe feels so guilty, you are all getting rings. Craig Kilborn

Kobe Bryant and the Lakers are playing the Nuggets in Denver tonight. Kobe's wife is excited because any time Kobe goes to Colorado she gets jewelry. Jay Leno

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