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Jay Leno Jokes


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Jay Leno joked during his monologue, "Last night, NBC aired the Jennifer Lopez special. Anybody watch that? They're doing one of those documentaries now, one of those 'making of' specials, it's called 'Jennifer Lopez: Behind the buttocks.' I think it's going to be on next week."


Jay Leno joked about J.Lo during his monologue on Tuesday saying, "And on November 20th [2001], NBC will air a Jennifer Lopez special. So if you're thinking of getting one of those wide screen TVs, this is the time to to do it."


Happy birthday Jennifer! Tonight Jay Leno joked that for her birthday, friends wanted to give her a birthday spanking, but that it may take a few days as they have alot of ground to cover!


Jennifer Lopez was joked about on The Tonight Show. Jay said she told Teen People the secret to her sexyness, which Kevin guessed "her booty". He said it was her feet and that she always wears pretty shoes. Jay joked "How many men even know she has feet?"


Jay Leno joked about J-Lo and broke news at the same time Friday in his monologue saying, "People love to gossip. Here's -- the stupid internet thing. It seems, during an interview on a website, Jennifer Lopez -- now, I hadn't heard. Had you heard this? Jennifer Lopez implied that she broke up with Puff Daddy, because Puff Daddy may have cheated on her. I don't know when Puff Daddy may have cheated, I just hope it wasn't that night he spent in jail."


Jay Leno again joked about J-Lo's Oscar outfit in his monologue Thursday saying, "Did you check that new box on the form -- the new tax form? That one new box? You know what I'm talking about? It says, 'check here.' Like $1 to go towards buying Jennifer Lopez a bra. Did you check that? I think, I didn't bother with it this year. I guess it kind of helped out. You saw them at the awards."


Jay Leno joked about the latest Jennifer Lopez news Tuesday night saying, "According to the New York Post, Jennifer Lopez applies makeup to her breasts whenever she wears a see-through top. I guess without the makeup she feels naked."


Jay Leno joked about a Newsweek report that said Jennifer and Puffy may be getting back together again saying, "first of all, before we get to the joke, why is that even in Newsweek? Remember they used to report about the Mideast and Sharon? Now, they're, 'Oh, Puff Daddy in love --' anyway. No, they claim that they just separated during the trial, because he needed more time to concentrate on his own butt for a while."


Jay Leno was joking that Jennifer Lopez cut off her romance with Puffy after she caught him downloading her songs for free on Napster. Leno also said he heard the romance was over 6 months ago but continued pretend otherwise to help him on his court case and joked, "Hey, it worked for Clinton."


Jay Leno joked about the Puffy - Jennifer Lopez breakup saying that they split on friendly terms, and it wasn't like he held a gun to her head. Jay also cracked that the next time J-Lo hears gunfire she'll say, "Ohh... that was our song!"


Jay Leno joked about J.Lo's booty in his monologue Tuesday saying, "Actually, Hannibal is so successful, the plans are under way now for a third sequel, another one. And in the third one that's coming, Hannibal meets Jennifer Lopez and cooks up a delicious rump roast."


Jay Leno joked Jennifer Lopez must be pretty happy with the #1 album, #1 movie, and #1 boyfriend on the FBI Most Wanted list.

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