On a scale from one to ten, how obsessed with Harry Potter are you?
About nine and three quarters.
What's the most unrealistic thing about the Harry Potter books?
A ginger with two friends.
Why did Professor Snape stand in the middle of the road?
So you'll never know which side he's on.
What do you call a Hufflepuff with one brain cell?
What do you call a Hufflepuff with two brain cells?
How many Muggles does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One. It is the only thing they are good for.
Why did Severus Snape stand in the middle of the road?
So nobody could tell what side he was on!
How can you tell which Harry Potter movie you are watching?
By the size of Hermione Granger's breasts!
You don't get my Harry Potter jokes?
There must be some thing RON with you.
Why was Harry Potter sent to the office?
Because he was cursing in class!
Why doesn't Voldemort have glasses?
What do you call a Persian who smokes pot?
How does Harry Potter get rid of a rash?
How do you know if someone's a pureblood?
Don't worry they'll let you know.
What did the comedian say to Harry Potter?
Why so Sirius?
Why does Voldemort only use Twitter and not Facebook?
Cause he only has followers, not friends
What did the golden snitch say when Harry Potter was itchy?
How many Hufflepuffs does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
All of them.
Why does Sirius Black have so many girlfriends?
Once you go black you siriusly dont go back!
Why did Harry Potter cross the road?
No reason, but someone will write fan fiction about it.
Have you heard about the new X rated Harry Potter movie?
Hairy Cooter and the Sorcerer's Bone.
Why did Death Eaters cross the road?
The Dark Lord ordered it.
What does Harry Potter have that Voldemort doesn't?
How do Death Eaters freshen their breath?
What do you call a movie about Daniel Radcliffe getting high?
What do you call a potterhead on a horse?
What is bigfoot's favorite book?
Did you survive Avada Kedavra?
Cause your drop dead gorgeous.