Floyd Mayweather Jokes


Q: Why does Floyd Mayweather have "TGIF" written on his boxing shoes?
A: Toes Go In First.

Q: Why is Floyd Mayweather a crossword puzzle boxer?
A: You enter the ring vertical and leave horizontal!

Q: What does Manny Pacquiao plan to write on Floyd Mayweathers tombstone?
A: "You can stop counting. I'm not getting up."

Q: How do you know that Floyd Mayweather only boxes against weak out of their prime opponents?
A: One opponent was the only boxer in the history of the sport to be knocked out while shadow boxing!

Q: How are a Bud Light bottle and Floyd Mayweather Jr alike?
A: They are both empty from the neck up.

Q: How do you confuse Floyd Mayweather Jr.?
A: Stick him in a round room and tell him to sit in the corner.

Q: Why did the Floyd Mayweather Jr stare at a can of frozen orange juice?
A: Because it said concentrate.

Q: What did Ricky Hatton's manager tell him inbetween rounds during a fight with Floyd Mayweather Jr?
A: "Let him hit you with his left for awhile. Your face is crooked."

Q: Why was the Floyd Jr. proud for finishing a puzzle in only six months?
A: The box said "2 to 4 years!"

Q: What do they call a boxer who gets beaten up by Floyd Mayweather in a fight?
A: A sore loser.

Q: What is the difference between a woman and Floyd Mayweather?
A: Floyd Mayweather stands up to be knocked down. The woman lies down to be knocked up!

Q: What does Floyd Mayweather do if the dishwasher stops working?
A: He HITS HER.

Q: How bad is a Floyd Mayweather meltdown?
A: So bad Al Gore is making a documentary about it!

Q: What is loud and hysterical?
A: Floyd Mayweather's baby mama, Josie Harris, after he beats her!

Q: What's a bigger lie than Floyd Mayweather pleading "Not Guilty"?
A: Charlie Sheen pleading to be sober & a feminist.

Q: "What do you call a guy that doesn't know how to use a condom?
A: Floyd Mayweather Sr dad"

Q: What did Floyd Mayweather say to Josie Harris with 2 black eyes?
A: Nothing he already told her twice!


Mayweather vs De La Hoya

Floyd Mayweather and Oscar De La Hoya went through the motions, hardly touching one another.
They danced around and around. Finally the referee got them in a clinch and said,
"I don't mind your dancing around like that, but dipping is out!"

Mayweather vs Pacquiao

Floyd Mayweather Jr and Manny Pacquiao, finally decided to the mother of all fights.
Halfway into the fourth round, Manny Pacquiao released a mighty punch that sent Mayweather to the mat for the count.
As his handlers carried him from the ring on a stretcher, the Mayweather groaned and spoke in a feeble voice,
"What happened? I hurt all over!"
"Easy does it, Floyd," said his manager. "You're in better shape than Manny at the moment."
"How can you say that?" Mayweather asked. "I never laid a glove on him."
"No," his manager responded, "but we left him back there in the ring a total wreck. He thinks he killed you."



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