AstroNut Jokes

Lisa Nowak is the woman who drove 900 miles from Houston, Texas to Orlando. Florida wearing a diaper to murder her romantic rival

Q: How did Lisa Nowak feel after driving 900 miles in a diaper?
A: Like one of Britney Spears kids!

Q: What's Lisa Nowaks nickname?
A: Spongebob Moistpants!

Q: How do you know when Lisa Nowak is pissed?
A: Just see if she's wearing diapers!

Q: When Lisa was in outer space what kinds of things did she like to do?
A: The Commander!

Q: What is Lisa Nowak's favorite astrological study?
A: The Big Bang Theory!

Q: How did Russia begin a new space race with the United States?
A: By having a cosmonaut drive 1800 miles in a diaper!

Q: When did Lisa Nowak's husband decide to end their marriage
A: After she came home with a wig, steel mallet, pepper spray, hard rubber hose, steel knife, and garbage bag!

Q: What did NASA decide to do after the Lisa Nowak scandal?
A: Stop recruiting astronauts from

Q: What product is Lisa Nowak now endorsing?
A: Huggies with the Special Astronaut Fit

Q: What does OJ call the items Lisa Nowak was carrying with her on 900 mile road trip (steel mallet, wig, garbage bag, etc)?
A: An Overnight bag!

Q: Why did everyone want to sit next to Lisa Nowak on her return flight to Texas?
A: Because they knew she wasn't going to get up for any bathroom breaks

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