Q: What do you get when you cross a turtle and a porcupine?
A: a slow-poke.
Q: What do turtles use to communicate?
A: A shellphone!
Q: Why did the turtle cross the road?
A: To get to the shell station!
Q: What does a turtle do on it's birthday?
A: It shellebrates!
Q: What kind of photos does a turtle take?
Q: Why is turtle wax so expensive?
A: Because their ears are so small!
Q: Where do you send turtles who commit crimes?
A: To the shell-block.
Q: What do you call a turtle with 6 feet?
A: A 6-foot turtle.
Q: What happens when you bring a turtle to a party?
A: It becomes a shellebration.
Q: What did the cow say to the turtle?
A: Get a moove on
Q: What do you call a famous turtle?
A: A shellebrity.
Q: What is a Leatherback Sea Turtles favorite sandwich?
A: Peanut butter and jellyfish.
Q: What happens when you get into fight with a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle?
A: You get shell shocked.
Q: What do you call a turtle that shits a lot?
A: a turdle
Q: What kind of jokes do sea turtles tell?
A: Shell-arious ones!
Q: What do you get if cross a Turtle with a Giraffe?
A: A Turtle-Neck
Q: What does a turtle do during winter?
A: Sit by the fire and worm himself up.
Q: Why didnt Shell City have any rules?
A: Because it was turtlely extreme.
Q: What do you call a truck-load of tortoises crashing into a train-load of terrapins?
A: a turtle disaster.
Q: What happens when your kids want to buy a tortoise?
A: You shell out a lot of money.
Q: Why couldn't the ninja turtle cross the road?
A: Because it didn't have enough turtle power.
Q: What does a turtle need to ride a bike?
A: A shellmet.
Q: What do you call a turtle with a hard on?
A: A slow poke.
Q: Why didnt the tortoise cross the road?
A: It got turtled.
Q: What do you call a sea turtle that flies?
A: A shell-icopter!
Q: What did the pig say to the turtle?
A: I'm boared
Q: What do you get when you cross a pig and a tortoise?
A: A slow-pork.
Money comes like a turtle and goes like a rabbit.
If a turtle loses it's shell is it naked or homeless?
Some turtles possess the ability to absorb oxygen directly from the water in which they swim.